Monday Morning Ickiness

I want to achieve so much this week, as in every week, and will probably fail miserably again. Why are Monday mornings ALWAYS Monday mornings, wherever you are, whatever you're doing? I think we should scrap the week altogether.

Mum told me interesting stuff last night. Apparantly we can give out energy which can effect other people when they pick up on it. Prophet guy can see the colour of the energy - black is the worst, red and grey are also bad, ranging to gold which is the best kind of energy that God wants us to produce. It makes sense in a strange other-world kinda way... but what really irritates me is the way the "prophet" can almost dictate what other people are feeling - he told Mum that I was giving out black energy when people were arriving for their "Bible" study last night. I was upstairs playing flute, one of the most beautiful pieces of music in the world (from A Midsummer Night's Dream by Mendelssohn), admittedly getting a bit frustrated because it's hard to play, but enjoying the music. And that was spewing out black energy. This guy told Mum she was giving out grey energy a few nights ago and she believed him, even though she didn't feel it.

The annoying thing is that when Mum tells me this stuff it makes me really annoyed, so therefore antagonistic towards her especially when she doesn't accept that I'm not going to believe everything she tells me. And she always catches me when I'm down or haven't read the Bible for ages or prayed properly for a while.

Dissatisfaction with everything is continuing, but the challenge seems to be to make what comes out of it good and beautiful, rather than negative and destructive.