Stupid title box

Just got back from church, went to TEC again. I know being a Christian shouldn't be based on feelings because they're generally most unreliable, but I'm wondering if today would have been better if I'd gone in a better frame of mind. I was almost ready to not go this morning just because it's one of those days where I'd rather be on my own and not talk to any strangers. But go I did, and it was okay. Another warm welcome, and a couple of people I met last week sought me out to say hello which was nice. The talk was about getting back on track - doing all the little things that help us keep close to God and on the right road, like regular prayer and meditating on the Word, meeting with Christian friends to encourage each other and being part of fellowship in a church (still skeptical about that one).

Haven't done much this week because I've had tonsillitus again and it won't go away. Maybe that's why I'm grumpy! This week I'll be doing more job hunting (latest one is for Costa, yay! I love waitressing), joining a couple of agencies that I had to postpone last week, and getting down to more proofreading work, I've been really lax in that. The grass needs tackled at some point, wooo! I've never felt so contented in life, it's strange because I was in the same position at the beginning of my gap year while looking for the next step, and it was so depressing even though I had uni to look forward to. But I have this real sense of peace now, that it really doesn't matter if things aren't perfect because God is always with me and it's so great to be able to praise him.

Last night I watched 'The Talented Mr Ripley' with Matt Damon, Jude Law (yum) and Gwyneth Paltrow. It was brilliant, a good story based on a novel with some brilliant acting, I think Jude Law got a best supporting actor Oscar or some award for it. It's been added to my reading list!

Beach

Post Secret

I came across this site through another BBC article about blogs. It's interesting, take a look (but I take no responsibility for content!)

Happy Sunday

Yesterday I went to Taverham Evangelical Church, affectionately known to it's members as the TEC. It's attached to Assemblies of God and meets in the village hall, five minutes walk from my house. So why have I never been before? I've grown up with Mum calling it weird and I've never bothered to question her!

It's a fairly small church, there was about 50 people there. I was greeted at the door by Gill who invited me to sit with her. There were some worship songs led by a small band at the front, but they weren't on a platform or intrusive in any way which was nice. After notices and an intercessory/open prayer time, the assistant (female) pastor talked about Phillipians 2 - shining like stars and being servants. I miss the kind of sermons given at Surrey Chapel with lots of meat from the Bible. This one was good, encouraging and uplifting but more anecdotal.

After the service Gill introduced me to two guys about my age, one of whom was the pastor's son and said he recognised me, maybe from middle school in the village. He's planning to go to Hillsong in Sydney next year for some training. I also talked to his dad, the senior pastor, who was one of the founders of the church about 14 years ago. He was really friendly and genuine, I enjoyed talking to him and he was keen to make sure I had all the information I wanted. He said the overall ethos of the church was about loving each other, which I had already picked up from the service, it seems to be a nice church family. He encouraged me to come again so I get a rounded view of the church. I had no problem agreeing to that, it was a good morning and I'm looking forward to going again next week!

More stuff

I was intending to blog about church today, but I'd much rather write about My Fair Lady because it's sitting in front of me. Old films are great, specially ones with Audrey Hepburn and big song and dance numbers. I just had a fantastic thought: I'll do a random blog. On my desk there is...

a laptop
a desk lamp
two DVDs
a pink stripey mug
a candle holder
paperweight
a stereo and a CD
pot of pens
a coaster and an empty glass
two books on churchy stuff
a dictionary
a letter
two bracelets
a watch
a hair clip
theatre tickets
a job rejection (it would've been dead boring)
packet of fine coloured pens (one of my most prized possessions!)

It's incredible how much stuff we have... all this is just on my desk :-/ Oh to sell it all and live in a tent. Would be brilliant.

Books n stuff

Hello readers, I haven't had anything interesting to write about so I've stopped blogging. But I miss it so now I'm just gonna write and see if I can make a story out of nothing (I'm thinking about doing a journalism course after proofreading!)

Reading is one of my favourite ever things to do, something to do with losing yourself and expanding horizons. The world is such an exciting place and there's so much to learn! As soon as I've fininshed 'Mrs Dalloway' I want to start on 'The Handmaid's Tale'. I still have a bookmark in 'The Emerging Church' by Dan Kimball... it's still something I want to know more about but sometimes I just want to get on with life and stop daydreaming, and emerging church is one of those things that don't yet seem grounded in reality in my mind. Looking forward to starting 'In Search of Authentic Faith' sometime soon.

Proofreading course is going pretty well, it's interesting though I'm slogging through learning lots of strange squiggles at the moment which is tedious. But studying from home is so great, as soon as I start doodling and realise I'm bored I can leave it for a while and come back later, and I have no guilt trips because there are no deadlines. I've decided to give myself a target for finishing the course so it doesn't drag on forever, and as I have a handy countdown clock on my computer for Harry Potter 6 (currently 58 days, 2 hours and 31 minutes!) that's my deadline! Should finish well before then though.

Well, that was a pretty good ramble about nothing.

Yay!

Got an A in my first proofreading test :)

Helping Mum around the house today and doing some more of my course. We have one of her friends to stay and be looked after because he had an operation yesterday.

My aim for the rest of this week is to be more loving towards Mum (please tell me off if I moan). Lou's profile - "I try my best to be lovely" - is challenging me!

Beyond Borders

My friends are probably sick of me going on about this film, but I can't get it out of my head. A bit of blurb - Beyond Borders (2004) stars Angelina Joli as 'Sarah Jordan, a sheltered American socialite living in London. When she meets Nick Callahan (Clive Owen) a rengrade doctor, his commitment to humanitarian efforts in war-torn nations moves her deeply. Driven by her passion for Nick [there has to be a Hollywood element somewhere I suppose] and his life's work, Sarah risks everything to embark on a perilous journey that leads to the most volitile far corners of the earth.'

This is the kind of film that has you in tears in the first ten minutes. It portrays the stark difference between the huge waste that goes on in Western civilisation and the desperate need of people affected by war and famine. How can there be such an awful imbalance in the world? More importantly, what can we do about it?

UNHCR (United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees) is featured in Beyond Borders, which led to Angelina Joli becoming a goodwill ambassador for them. You can read her Sudan diaries here. The themes are still playing in my mind weeks after watching this...

Dreams 1

Someone told me recently that out of frustration, vision is birthed. I have lots of frustrations, all of them often including me, so please don't see this as picking at others as if I'm blameless...

* Church can be dull, where people have lost passion for God and forgotten to fix their eyes on Him and give Him their all
* Church can be lively and relevant to today's culture but can fail to be authentic
* There's a need, a HUGE need, in this country for God. People need to be saved!
* There isn't any persecution in this country - that suggests to me that there's something wrong with the body of Christ in Britain. When good things are happening for God, there is persecution and hardship to deal with as a result. Are we really as on fire for God as we'd like to think?
* Complacency and apathy are irritating. We're too comfortable in our Sunday routines, sitting in our comfortable seats listening to a mildly challenging sermon. Where's the passion? Where's the urgency?

Other half to this will have to come later, it's been a challenging evening.

Fridays...

... was rocking tonight! Had a really good prayer time before it started with some other Fridayites which set the tone for the evening. One of the leaders said at the end that they really felt God working, and I totally agreed, it was a different feeling to Proclaimers where they seem to say that all the time yet nothing resonates within me. Hmm, still very much undecided on the church front.

Lord of all creation
Of water, earth and sky
The heavens are your tabernacle
Glory to the God on high

God of wonders beyond our galaxy
You are holy, holy
The universe declares your majesty
You are holy, holy

Hallelujah to the Lord of heaven and earth

Forgiveness

People say that faith is a crutch for those too weak to deal with life without it. I say that it becomes a crutch when I fail to acknowledge at all times that God is bigger and better than me. When life suddenly get hard and I realise I can't go it alone, I'm treating God like a crutch. That isn't what God demands of me. He's not my back-up plan, He's there to be worshipped 24/7, 100% of my time. I tend to forget that when life is great, God is even greater and still demands my worship. 'Faith is a crutch' is my fault. My inadequacy can turn into people's arguments against God, and that isn't giving God His due.

You humble me, Lord
You humble me, Lord
I'm on my knees, empty
You humble me, Lord
You humble me, Lord
Please, please, please forgive me