Thursday, July 06, 2006

Musings on parents and forgiveness

I had a thought this morning that I'd like to open my Bible, but then I thought that maybe wouldn't be a good thing to do. I'm at work, and at that moment I was being paid to work. It occurred to me that it wouldn't really be honouring God to read the Bible instead of being a good employee and doing the work I'm paid to do.

St Augustine's is still pretty good. Last Sunday was the end of a divine consciousness course or something and I gather half the people there had been on this mid-week course and had come to church for the end of it. They all seemed very alert spiritual people. I don't know if any were Christians or if they ever went to church, but it was cool to see that even if they didn't, they were still aware of their creator and were looking to him and hearing his whispers to them through their everyday lives. The service started with looking through newspapers and cutting out an article that inspired or touched you. That was challenging - I don't think I very often let things touch me.

The talk mentioned that St Augustine's had been meeting on that site for over 800 years, and how forgiveness was a key point in making something last that long. The main reason for relationships breaking down, whether it be marriages (apparently lasting 7 years on average!!!) or bands (5 years average), is that people eventually get to something that they find it impossible to forgive. Nicholas talked about needing to forgive the church for doing stupid and wrong things at times which is a good point. I've often been annoyed at the church for various things and have chosen to leave it completely for a while, but now going back to church I see that it might be a struggle at times but part of having a relationship with a community like that is practising love and forgiveness. I think the thing that touched me about the service was that I need to forgive.

More cool things about forgiveness along the families theme have cropped up this week - Dave's blog on his father is interesting, Ben's comment too. Especially the concept that we probably all have that we'll turn out to be like our parents and do to our children what they have done to us. Sometimes I marvel at the way Ben deals with his father and I know that his legacy to our children will be amazing because he's undone what his father has done to him by forgiving and loving him, and that will give him a huge advantage when he's a parent. There's a theme in the Bible about families being cursed for the next few generation when people ignore God - an example from today's society is that it's often parents who were abused themselves who abuse their children. Horridness can be an everlasting cycle until someone chooses to break the chain. The flip side to the Bible's take on this is huge blessing when a link in that chain is broken and someone decides to do what is right. When that happens the Bible says generations (lots of them) will be blessed as a result:

'For I, the LORD your God, am a jealous God, punishing the children or the sin of the father to the third and fourth generation of those who hate me, but showing love to a thousand generations of those who love me and keep my commandments.' - Exodus 20

Love and forgiveness have huge impacts beyond out imaginations. I totally agree with Dave that it's really hard when parents don't acknowledge that they're spanners and when they keep making life difficult. For me it's a work in progress and I know God will win in both me and my mum, maybe my dad too.

'Do not hold us against the sins of the fathers; may your mercy come quickly to meet us, for we are in desperate need... We your people, the sheep of your pasture, will praise you forever and ever; from generation to generation we will recount your praise.' - Psalm 79

4 comments:

Ben F. Foster Esq. (c) said...

amen

sparkles said...

wow amazing post. Given me some food for thought.

Helsalata said...

Nice one. Plenty of food for thought...

Ben F. Foster Esq. (c) said...

Well mused, dear.